Super Sunday

So I spent about 3 hours this morning just quietly crying on the couch in the family room.

At some point yesterday, my concern changed from worrying about a miscarriage to worrying about a “missed miscarriage.” Basically, your body doesn’t expel the fetus, so it is still inside of you, but with no heartbeat.

I know this sounds morbid. But you have to understand, I am going a little crazy here.  If this pregnancy is in fact over, I can and will deal with the loss. But I need to know.  This sitting here and wondering, half mourning, half hoping for the impossible…IT’S. KILLING. ME.

I still have to take my shots because what if and just in case.  I still had to avoid a philadelphia roll when we went out for sushi the other night because smoked fish is a no-no for preggos.

Yeah, there is no way I am waiting until Wednesday for my next ultrasound.  First thing tomorrow morning I am calling the doctor’s office and demanding that they see me tomorrow.

If my instincts are right and I have to have a D&C then I want to know, get it done and over with and begin to move on.


About llipps

New mom, infertility survivor, marketer, wife, daughter and friend. I struggle to find the balance between being all things to all people and being happy with who I am. I love meeting new people, telling my stories, and hearing yours.
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